Release destructive emotions

 

Bug Proof Yourself: Putting Up Your Shield

Lynne Namka, Ed.D. - © 1989 


Triggers to being teased happen because you have not learned to shield yourself from negative energy from others. When people feel bad inside, they try to make others feel bad also by calling them ugly names. They want to throw their negative energy on you! You can learn to put up an imaginary invisible shield to prevent others from getting you.

To prepare mentally for name-calling, visualize yourself putting up a shield for self-protection. Choose the type of shield that fits you best. Your armor may be made of heavy metal, gold, silver, clear acrylic, or it may be made of a gossamer fabric. Choose the material that will provide the best protection from acid remarks. The shield will allow helpful information to get through. The shield protects your only from blame, unjust criticism and remarks and cuss words like “@, %, #, etc.” You don’t want to block out feedback that is helpful to you.

Use the imaginative powers of your mind to place the shield in front of you and feel how safe and secure you are. Nothing can penetrate the shield unless you allow it come through. Notice how your skin is becoming thicker, acting as a second shield so that you choose what is allowed into your mind and body.

Now visualize a petty tyrant (a bully) calling you names and trying to unnerve you. View the words coming out of his mouth as negative energy. See how it moves through the air toward you as a negative choice which you can make choices. Visualize it as arrows, spears and rocks coming at you.

The negative energy signals you to put up your shield. You are safe from the verbal insults of others as long as your choose to be protected by the shield of your mind. See the slurs and slings fall off your shield, keeping you free from the negative energy.

See how the angry remarks fall to the ground, go around you, over your head, or bounce back to the speaker. Imagine him disarmed, being caught in a barrage of his own doing. See yourself standing straight and tall, proud of your accomplishment of deflecting negative energy.

Remember that someone else gets angry at times to try to instruct you to to change your behavior. Being the wise person that you are, decide to look behind the anger to see if there is a message for you. Allow any information that is needed to penetrate your shield. This is a very clever shield. It can discriminate between what is good for you to hear and what needs to be discarded.

Deflect any negative energy in the form of angry words and see how the other person is:
 1. Trying to hurt you with negative words (bullies)

 2. Trying to teach you with negative words (usually adults such as parents)



Practice Deflecting Negative Energy
To learn a new skill, you must practice, practice, practice! See and feel your shield coming up when you spot someone who wants to hurt you. Remember, he or she feels bad inside so they want to make you feel bad. That is how feeling badness inside is passed from one person to another.

Practice different versions of confrontations with different difficult people over and over in your mind with your shield up. Of course since you are making up the story, make yourself the hero or heroine who is stronger than anything that is thrown at you verbally.

Then practice with a partner who throws cotton balls or Nerf balls at you saying the ugly words that have triggered you in the past. Knock the balls away when they come at you and say, “I’m not that.” Or you can dodge the ugly word triggers--just don’t let them get into you.

If the ball of ugly words hits you, remember your thick skin and just let the ball fall away. Don’t let it stick to you. Don’t be a Velcro person. Be a Teflon person! You decide if you want to take ugly negative energy from others who do not feel good about themselves into your body and heart and let it wound you OR if you let it bounce off you. Ultimately, only you are in charge of what you take into your mind and body.

Lynne Namka, Ed. D. is a happy psychologist, mom, grandmother, author of anger release books and founder of Talk, Trust & Feel Therapeutics. Her is mission is to promote peace in the world by teaching people positive communication skills. Helpful information and techniques can be found at www.AngriesOut.com and www.TimeToLoveYourself.com. Copyright © 1989 Lynne Namka, Ed.D. All rights reserved. Permission granted to reprint this article on your website without altercation if you include this entire copyright statement and leave the hyperlinks live and in place.

 

 
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